Inevitably every year that I do my annual free August fitness accountability challenge, the same insecurities and mindset struggle comes up: “I feel weird sharing my workouts because it feels like bragging.”
I start to see a lot of gals preempting their posts to their followers (family and friends): “Sorry guys, you are going to have to endure my annoying post-workout selfies this month because I am doing a workout challenge with @jillfit where we have to log our workouts every day.”
Now I get it. I totally do. And I would have felt the exact same way before I, well, started putting my entire life online, lol.
But it’s been so long since I have been worried about how my posting online is received by others (even family and friends who are sometimes the trickiest), that I FORGOT that it might be sensitive for some. But I loved the reminder because it gives us all an opportunity to explore what’s going on here.
So, a few things:
You are participating in the #MetconMonster because you want to elevate your workout game and you want to be consistent and strive for more. THIS sort of commitment requires we put ourselves on the hook. Like Seth Godin says, “Opportunities come from being on the hook.”
Commitment is scary. Having others watch us is scary. Playing at a bigger level is scary. Accountability is scary!
Not only do we fear maybe not completing the challenge (“How embarrassing!”), but we’re also scared of what others might think of us:
Will I annoy people?
Will they get sick of seeing me working out day after day?
Will they take offense to my posts and unfollow me?
And worst of all … am I bragging???
I love this conversation.
And so much of these (normal) fears come from operating at a specific level for so long – operating in a preventative versus a proactive, inclusive way.
In my annual Best of You business coaching mentorship, we often talk about allowing the chips to fall in terms of how you are perceived online. Especially when you have a personal brand business and are sharing your personality, your desires, fears, successes and struggles. It feels really exposed.
And in a way, during this #MetconMonster, you, too, are becoming your own brand ambassador. You are sharing who you are, what you do and hey, how amazing and powerful you are, too! You are becoming a walking billboard for your badassery.
And how that’s perceived is not controllable by you.
But it feels like apologizing for being “annoying” preempts their negative response—like, it shows that you are self-aware and in on the joke.
Except … what if instead of trying to preempt any negative, we just assumed that most would instead actually like seeing the posts daily and maybe even feel motivated themselves to join in?
YOU GET TO BE A WALKING EXAMPLE OF SOMEONE WHO IS LEVELING UP.
That’s an amazing opportunity and not something to hide behind!
Never apologize for leveling up.
And if someone is annoyed or does unfollow, then … might we just take the “So What” Approach?
How could you have prevented it? Not done the challenge. Skipped it. Opted out of the opportunity to put yourself on the hook (yes, publicly) and continued to play small and scared?
Now, there’s nothing wrong with not sharing—to each their own—but if you find that you want to and you want to get involved, don’t let your negativity bias (the natural human tendency to imagine the worst) keep you from jumping in.
Gimme those check-ins!
And when you find yourself doubting or worrying about how you are being perceived, remember that your only obligation is to yourself, and we can never EVER dream of controlling how we’re perceived by others.
If someone feels threatened by your show of commitment or finds it to be bragging, then chances are it’s hitting some kind of insecurity trigger for them (I think we all relate, even!), which is unfortunate, but also not your job to manage or prevent.
Showcasing your wins (and struggles) and commitment isn’t bragging. It’s a fact. It’s a factual representation of what you are currently doing. It’s the interpretation of that fact that we want to try to control.
But we can’t because … “Trying to make everyone happy, besides being impossible, is the surest way to make yourself miserable.” -Tim Ferriss
Don’t be afraid to be an example.
Don’t be afraid to ditch the low vibes.
Don’t be scared to publicly commit.
Don’t be afraid of the accountability.
Just show up. Do your best, and then let the chips fall in terms of how that’s perceived. Let’s go, we got shit to do! ;)
Some tweetables for you:
